How I became someone else

Then learned to be myself again.

I learned when I was wild and ridiculous I was too much. I shouldn’t draw attention to myself. That's not how people should behave.

I learned when I was excited about something its annoying, I should calm down and shut up about it.

I learned I should look to the world outside of me to know if I was acceptable.

I learned I need to look and behave a certain way to be liked.

I learned money required consistent hard work and is bestowed upon you by someone else, and there’s never quite enough of it.

I learned being different was dangerous because it meant rejection and exclusion.

I learned sharing my knowledge and experience was annoying and lead to rejection.

I learned no one cared what I had to say unless I was a certain age with a certain degree.

And then I learned none of that shit is true.

I learned I have control over what I think, feel, and do.

I learned everyone’s world is created by their thoughts and beliefs, and it has nothing to do with me, but it can if I lead by example.

I learned I am the unconscious patterns and behaviors I picked up in my past, but I don’t have to be.

I learned I am the story that I tell. I can change my story, without changing the facts.

I learned I am capable of far more than normally do. If I put in my average effort, I will always get average results.

I learned I am the most important person in my life.

I learned my words and actions have enormous impact.

I learned when I can influence myself I can influence others.

I rediscovered the inherent wisdom within me, children understand, adults complicate.

I learned being honest and being myself gives others the freedom to do the same.

I learned I can’t get everyone to “get it”, and that’s ok, it isn’t the right time or I'm not the right messenger.

I learned if you want to do something consistently and easily, make it who you are.

I learned too many people do the same thing over and over again, expecting the results to change. Myself included. You have to have routines, so choose them intentionally.